Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
