he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
