i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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