You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Randomize
