Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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