I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i love accidental penises.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Randomize
