Small penises have feelings too.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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