trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Someone shattered a urinal.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
