you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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