a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize