Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
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