Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
