I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Two words: blizzard sex
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Randomize
