In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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