real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
