I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
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I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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