Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
