he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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