Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I stole a fireplace last night.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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