yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
