i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
