When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
