How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I will pee on everything he values.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
