Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
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good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
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In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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