You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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