Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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