nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Randomize
