ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
