nut hugger
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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