Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
