I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
