I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
