$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Found your dick twin last night
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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