seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
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Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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