Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
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I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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