it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
false alarm, still single
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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