Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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