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• (914): View more from New York

  dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (310): View more from California

  I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.

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• (619): View more from California

  Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders

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• (805): View more from California

  I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog

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