Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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