Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Randomize
