Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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