bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
