are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
