He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
We got so high we made milksteak
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize