so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
