yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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