Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!

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(413): no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo! http://tfl.nu/f58l

Replies (4) Good night (1654) Bad night (2387) Order T-Shirt
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(925): View more from California

My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.

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(925): My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over. http://tfl.nu/xmqi

Replies (1) Good night (1479) Bad night (506) Order T-Shirt
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(407): View more from Florida

im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes

(1-407): View more from Florida

i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.

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(407): im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes (1-407): i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes. http://tfl.nu/3nr6

Replies (21) Good night (3967) Bad night (568) Order T-Shirt
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(519): View more from Ontario

this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.

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(519): this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn. http://tfl.nu/4r7g

Replies (11) Good night (607) Bad night (6507) Order T-Shirt
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(260): View more from Indiana

He went soft

(631): View more from New York

Wait. During?

(260): View more from Indiana

Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.

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(260): He went soft (631): Wait. During? (260): Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH. http://tfl.nu/18lb

Replies (99) Good night (808) Bad night (15764)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.

(347): View more from New York

Something to remember me by.

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(832): I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet. (347): Something to remember me by. http://tfl.nu/ual5

Replies (6) Good night (2478) Bad night (1782)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.

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(+44): he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway. http://tfl.nu/6dio

Replies (8) Good night (2672) Bad night (596) Order T-Shirt
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers

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(603): Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers http://tfl.nu/0i28

Replies (5) Good night (1737) Bad night (643) Order T-Shirt
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(859): View more from Kentucky

I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.

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(859): I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke. http://tfl.nu/mdh7

Replies (6) Good night (570) Bad night (1114) Order T-Shirt
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(901): View more from Tennessee

Do what your heart wants. . .

(504): View more from Louisiana

My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis

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(901): Do what your heart wants. . . (504): My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis http://tfl.nu/o9fm

Replies (7) Good night (2406) Bad night (688)
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(478): View more from Georgia

Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."

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(478): Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like." http://tfl.nu/6r4y

Replies (6) Good night (1022) Bad night (504)
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(289): View more from Ontario

Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.

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(289): Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel. http://tfl.nu/rxj6

Replies (8) Good night (842) Bad night (743) Order T-Shirt
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(347): View more from New York

maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life

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(347): maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life http://tfl.nu/rmnc

Replies (4) Good night (355) Bad night (857) Order T-Shirt
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(352): View more from Florida

Do you have paint?

(727): View more from Florida

Paint? I wish

(727): View more from Florida

OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING

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(352): Do you have paint? (727): Paint? I wish (727): OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING http://tfl.nu/qyml

Replies (2) Good night (757) Bad night (234)
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(216): View more from Ohio

I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex

(216): View more from Ohio

Never mind I found pizza just bring sex

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(216): I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex (216): Never mind I found pizza just bring sex http://tfl.nu/1kkn

Replies (4) Good night (1586) Bad night (370)

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