you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
