I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
