I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
