Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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